Divorce is tough – You can get through it though – Free advice and Stories on Divorce
Getting divorced is often very expensive – solicitors, housing, maintenance, bank accounts, health it all stacks up and can take a huge toll. Be you male or female, it throws up a huge amount of uncertainty.
There is help though, be you a mother or a father, or simply a couple looking to split and go your separate ways there are reams of books and advice you can arm yourself with before making that visit to a solicitor. If you can do it amiably it’s much better for your health, and long term you’ll feel better for behaving like a decent human being.
Of course it’s seldom that simple and whilst in the thick of ill feeling and acrimony you may well choose to nail the testicles or tits of your estranged to the floor boards. It goes without saying therefore that cognisance of this possibility will go some way to putting you into do mode and rejecting the preference for burying your head in the sand, hoping it will all go away.
1. Separate those bank accounts – go to your bank and explain that you are separated. Get your salary paid into a new account.
2. Ensure that commitments that affect you are met. Talk to your ex about the Mortgage – if you can’t then do make an appointment to see a Citizens advice counsellor or if you can afford one, a solicitor instead, many law firms give free consultations.
3. Tell friends and family what’s going on, don’t shoulder the burden alone. Friends and family are there to help, use them. Talk to a friend who has been through similar, or find a support network through relate or online.
4. Behave like a decent human being – think of your children, don’t use them to hurt him or her. It isn’t their fault, don’t punish them. Be the adult.
5. If you’ve just separated, recognise that in the UK at least, it takes time to get a divorce. It doesn’t happen overnight. Use that time to prepare yourself. Read books like Divorce: How to Help Yourself and Your Finances (Financial Intelligence) and be better equipped to handle what the future brings.
Try not to worry yourself too much – it will work out, it will be tough, you might feel like the world is ending but, it’s natural to feel that way. Good luck.
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