Still not absolute but..
I’m very happy that this chapter is almost over. Its been a hard slog. At times I’ve felt ripped apart, pulled to pieces by a range of emotions that I neither understood or could deal with.
I’ve learnt quite a bit about me and people. Somethings can’t be taught or bestowed, you just gotta live them. If you wan’t to build a house then you gotta put in the work, invest in the materials, learn new things, cope with setbacks.
Who to thank for helping me hold it all together? Lots of people really. Bob, Pete, Danielle, Jordan, Amber, Paul, Valerie, Del, Wayne, John,Eda, Dad, Dean, Dawn, Sophie, Maria, Richard, Anne and all the other kind souls who’ve been there for me in one way or another. I couldn’t of done it alone, and yet hat comments kinda silly, cos really I haven’t done very much at all, other than cope with an emotional and life crisis.
We all have to do things or come under the inspection of something that we’d rather not. There are lots of things we can avoid and hide from, lots of things that we can choose simply not to deal with. Divorce isn’t one of them, especially if you are the one being divorced!
I’m happy I don’t feel that rage anymore. Happy that the feelings of being lost and rejected are over, happy that I can now embrace my future with a renewed enthusiasm. I’m gonna work at hard at trying to be ok with my ex. I hope she can be happy too, happy with who she is and what she did. It wasn’t so bad, she couldn’t help how she felt, we’d both failed and that is that, I wasn’t exactly mr angel in the whole shaboogle.
Who is really to say that two people should stick it at it forever and ever? God? Nah, thats the church that says that, a piece of societal legislature aimed at building cohesion and stability. I don’t think any god would truly be content with people tearing lumps out of each other.
God is love, right?